First off, can you let us know how NFL Sisters in Service began and what you do?
We started Sisters in Service actually prior to 2015 – the wives and daughters of players started doing different service projects here in South Florida. We’ve worked to help families of missing children and with children who have been exploited. We’ve worked with the Trayvon Martin Foundation then because he was initially reported as missing.
We helped with a young lady in Baltimore who was kidnapped while visiting her dad – that’s how the Trayvon Martin family learned about us and reached out to us.
We decided to formally organize in 2015 and now are a 501c3.
You’ve done work in other areas now as well…
We help wives who’s children have autism and support charities in that cause. We help players get disability benefits. We help with Epilepsy causes – that’s a big post-retirement issue for players – even for some while they are playing. We give 100% of what we raise to causes and work on boards as well. We’ve raised $1.7 million so far.
How involved are you with the NFL?
We work with the NFLPA local chapters. Here in Florida we are a fiscal sponsor of the South Florida chapter and help them operate and fulfill their missions. We’ve been very successful in getting wives to attend meetings and events here. Once players leave the game they are often out of the loop of what the NFL is doing to help them, even though the NFL does a good job of sending information to players. But sometimes players don’t have the cognitive capacity to break that information down and decipher that information, so it’s important to have wives involved who can help with that. So we work with wives – and when players don’t have wives to help them, we ask the wives of the players that know them to help them as well – to make sure they still get that information.
How do you help when players suffer as much from the detachment of the game psychologically as they do from the physical aspects of the game?
One thing I tell players and their families is that the detachment is often likely related to the physical issues they suffer from. It’s similar to the military as well where they suffer from TDIs. They often isolate themselves due to things like ringing of the ears, confusion and memory loss and the aggravation that comes from all of that. That causes them to detach from the community. We want the wives involved so they can let those players know they aren’t the only ones and they should be as players talking to other players – those are the ones that know most what they are going through. They understand you the most.
What do you do for players who suffer those types of issues?
We connect them to community partners. One thing we have been doing now is connecting them with the Amen Clinic – we’ve raised money to help players go to the clinic and get brain scans. The clinic reads the scans and does other work to help those players. A lot are pre-’93 players but recent players too. They read those scans and determine what part of the brain is damaged and have treatment plans specific to the area of the brain that was damaged. That has been a gamechanger and has provided treatment and hope to players. We’ve been doing that for the past 18 months.
What brought you specifically to the point of starting this?
I was always community-minded. I was awarded the Presidential Service medal when I was in high school by President Bush. I always felt like I needed to give back.
When my husband Andre’ left the league I had no idea how frugal he was. We kept our finances separate. He has a brain injury from playing football when he was in his 20’s and was the first player awarded damages from the NFL for brain injuries. But I didn’t know the course of his preparation for what was next.
As an example, I came home one day and there was a big tax bill. I was concerned and went to the bank where I had my money. They knew who I was and took great joy in denying me a loan and ridiculing me.
Why?
I think some people rejoice in the downfall of those they celebrated. His wasn’t even a downfall – he had an injury.
I found out later though he had money and didn’t understand why I was so stressing out. But that made me realize that other wives were going through that same stress – those who didn’t have money. Remember – pre-’93 players were making $30,000 a year. When fans ask how those players became broke – that’s why. And after that experience I knew we needed to rely on our community to help one another.
We’ve since raised money for players who were homeless, legal expenses for players’ wives too. One example was a married player who had dementia, and their sister took them and stole all of their money. So we helped with that and other legal issues. So many things like that happen. And of course we help with medical bills and disability benefits.
Oh – and I took my money out of that bank, by the way!
What advice would you give current players and their families to prepare for these potential issues?
There are a lot of different needs that players may end up having. We’ve used our knowledge to help players avoid tax issues for example. One player sold their house and didn’t report it and needed help with tax concerns. Things like that we can help players and their families with in advance. Players need to realize that many people only look out for you while you’re playing and making money, and even then many of them only do it for what’s in it for them.
So we want players to get involved with the local NFLPA chapters now to hear and learn from retired players on what they are going through. Get involved now so they can learn from the vets who have gone before them. You don’t know what you need until you learn.
Any events people should know about coming up?
We are honoring Derrick Thomas on May 18th with a fundraiser we do every year. It’s an annual ball and fashion show – Derrick’s mother and sister will be there. We’ll also honor coach John Guy and Sheila Chamberlain, the first female African American fighter pilot in the Army. We do this fundraiser every year and the money helps fund STEM programs here in Miami.
Our focus is on the communities our husbands played in. We have a lot of love for those communities and want to give back to the next generation of players.
Lastly – any Pittsburgh connections?
We have a lot of active wives of players in Pittsburgh. I’d just say that if there are causes in Pittsburgh that would like our support, to reach out to us. We are a resource for you.